Emotional

Am I emotional??

That's an understatement!

I'm not sure why I can go from happy to sad to mad in a heartbeat, but I manage it.

Usually lately I feel really sad, trying to be happy. Like that I really want to just laugh and smile but really all I do is cry. And I can't control it either. I find it funny because my eyes always feel dry but yet I can cry non-stop.

As for others who don't show their emotions, I'm torn on it. Like on one hand I find it to be 'fake'. That they are trying to make it seem like their strong or something like that. That if they actually showed how they felt then they would be considered weak. But with that being said as well, I get it. I know how it is to make sure you don't let someone else know that they got to you the way they did because then it gives them power and Hell No am I going to give you power. So, I get both sides on it.

I mainly just show most of my sad emotions by myself. Which I think most ppl would .. idk.

But I do believe emotions are a good thing. Mainly because it shows compassion. It shows that you can look at something and understand how difficult or tough it must be. Instead of just being the pig of a person that says oh well.

Right now in recovery.. my emotions are high. I usually am sad. And once I kinda get over being sad, I'm mad. That alone pisses me off. I don't know how to handle all the emotions that I'm going thru from the past and even the ones that I'm dealing with daily. It just feels a bit overwhelming. Hopefully working thru them will get me where I need to be. *fingers crossed*